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A letter to my teenage girl

Hi Ada,

Today I turned 32. This year is different than any other years cause I now have a daughter. Yes! It’s you who came and completed my world. While I’m doing a full on mothering job and leaving my young life behind, there are lots of things I learned and I want to tell you my secrets while they are still fresh in mind.

1. Be yourself. You already are the most prefect girl.

I used to look at those perfect girls at school and thought to myself “I want to be like them”. But no matter what you do, no matter how hard you try to change yourself, you will never be someone else. You will still be you who copy someone else and appear trying to be like someone. What you can do is be the best version of yourself. Learn from them, don’t change but adjust. Experiment yourself. Find things that suit you and do things that good for your life.

2. Teenage time is valuable, teenage drama isn’t.

When you are a teenager, it feels like a circle of your friends is the whole world. Yes it is your whole world for 10 years at most (12 – 22 years old and you start your career life.) Don’t let dramas consume your soul. Still be nice but be tough too. If there’s anything upset you, walk away from it. Don’t ever think you won’t have any friends. This time is too valuable to waste. Spend it with friends who value you to create memories. But you know if there’s anything happens, I’ll be here cuddling you all night.

3. Don’t care for boys just yet. They don’t know what they want.

At this age you probably going to meet a boy who you think is a prince charming and you will marry him and live happily ever after and all of a sudden he doesn’t seem to want to see you anymore. Or a boy who seems to like you, tells his friends he likes you, his friends tell your friends he likes you, you like him back and he dumps you. Yeah, that happens! Boys don’t know what they want at this age. Wait until they start their career and know what they want, they will come after you later. Make friends but don’t waste your time with just a single boy thinking you would be together forever. It will save yourself heartaches and you can enjoy more time with other friends. Although if anything happens, I’ll still be here and cuddle you all night again.

4. Free time is precious.

When I was a teen I had so much free time just to go in town and hang around all day. As an adult, there’s no such thing as free time. There’s no half term at work and holidays cost thousands of pounds. When you still have it, use it wisely. Do hobbies, learn skills, hang out with good friends.

5. Don’t fall out with mummy. I’m your best friend.

I promise I’ll do my best not to be annoying and controlling. If you don’t want to do what I said, I’ll just let you live and learn. But sometimes I might say something that you don’t want to hear, it just because I can’t afford to see you take a wrong path. I want to be your best friend. We will go shopping together, go out for meals together, go on holidays together. I’ll take you to the club for the first time. We will share our clothes and shoes. I’ll even let you use my bags if you look after them.

6. Don’t fall out with your brother. He’s your other best friend.

Your brother loves you since day 2 you were born cause that’s the first time he saw you. He still wants to cuddle you, shows you to all his friends, drops you off at nursery. He’s so proud to be your brother. I’m sure 15 years onwards he still doesn’t change. If he says anything mean or looks as if he’s annoyed at you, it’s probably because he’s going through his teenage dramas too. Don’t take it seriously or think he doesn’t love you. Apart from mummy and daddy, he is the one who loves you more than anything in the world.

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When you’re a little sister…

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When you are a little sister… there might not be as much excitements when you were born but… your brother’s excitement was much more than everyone’s in the whole world combined.

When you are a little sister… you might not get as many visitors came to see you but… your brother tippy toeing watched you in your crib all day long.

When you are a little sister… you might not get as many gifts but… you brother picked and chose all the best baby toys he has for you… and piled them all over you.

When you are a little sister… you might not get as many compliments like “Awwww she’s so cute”, instead you get “She’s just like her brother” but… to your brother, you’re the cutest baby in the world… he said it all the time.

When you are a little sister… mummy is no longer the prettiest girl in the world, cause now there’s you and me… two prettiest girls in Joseph’s little world.